Over the weekend after Alabama’s triumphant win, Mac Jone
s trudged off the field and into the locker room. He removed his jersey and BAM! Next thing you know his picture is all over the internet. Mac showed off his impeccable dad bod with a cigar in his mouth, not a single fuck given in the world. This man is a potential Heisman winner this season and he looks like that white dad who drinks at his kids' baseball games. This man has been tearing up SEC defenses left and right but he’s out here looking like he mows the lawn on Saturday mornings. Knowing the chicks at Bama, Mac Jones is getting unlimited poon on campus not because he’s the starting quarterback for arguably the best team in the country, but because he’s rockin' a gorgeous dad bod.
Famous Jameis went #1 overall in the 2015 NFL Draft to Tampa Bay Buccaneers, but right before the Draft, a picture of him was unveiled working out on a random field. The dad bod syndrome hit Jameis smack in the face. The man who was made Famous from not only his play on the field but stealing $32 worth of crab legs from his local Publix. Who is eating $32 worth of crab legs by themself?? Listen the man can eat and his body proves that it has room for all these crab legs. 6’4 230 pounds and one mean gut for Jameis coming into the NFL, but this dad bod did not hold him back from getting chosen over the very fit Mariota. Dad bods are the style, this what the people want, and apparently this what NFL teams are looking for too when they are drafting a quarterback.
The goat of all goats when it comes to the dad bod. The man who made golf fun with his on the course antics and exceptional play. Name any professional in any sport who is smoking darts, smashing beers, and banging chicks all at the same time while they are playing the game they are getting paid for. John Daly has done it all over the years and he is still going. I watched this man step up on a Par 3, barefoot, rippin' a cig, and just completely sink a hole in one like it's nothing. He will make bets with random fans and sink putts for big money on mini-golf courses in the middle of nowhere. This dude fails to ever disappoint and it's all made possible because of his dad bod.
The King of New York. This man led the Giants to the promised land two times when they had no business being there. Dude has a lot of balls and no fucks walking around the Jersey Shore with a red bucket and that type of body. Despite having a downfall in play towards the end of his career, the man was a gridiron warrior. Eli never missed a game because of injury started every single game in his career (210) until some asshole by the name of Ben McAdoo came along benched Eli for fucking GENO SMITH!!! Geno Fucking Smith was going to be the answer for a 2-10 Giants football team at the time. This is the man who single-handedly stopped the legendary Tom Brady from having unlimited Super Bowls.
If not for Eli Manning’s dad bod, there’s no way that Tyree comes down with the ball on his helmet or Manningham making that miraculous toe-tapping catch on the sideline. The dad bod worked wonders for Eli and the 2008 (and 2012) Giants. Easily the best the dad bod of all time in the world of sports!