Jake Gyllenhaal Doesn't Shower... What Does That Mean for the Average Man

Celebrities have always brought a new brand of weird into our lives from the crazy Church of Scientology praise from Tom Cruise, to Gwyneth Paltrow making a candle with the scent of her vagina. Well, make way for the new celeb trend, not showering.


This got kicked off into the mainstream by Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis last week. They announced, completely unprompted, that as a couple that they rarely bathe. They claim the human body's natural oils do a good enough job at maintaining their hygiene that bathing is a waste or downright unhealthy.


I just don't get it. These are three of the best looking people in all of Hollywood with clear complexions and clean appearances. How does this work? Do they just take Italian showers and just let a half can of Axe do all the work? Do they just genuinely smell like shit and everyone is too afraid to say anything?



The true irony comes from Jake promoting his fragrance when he made the comments. It may be the greatest marketing ploy of all time. If there's a fragrance that can mask the stench of a man who works out and showers single digit times per year the game has seriously changed. Just think of all the applications. Just smoked a blunt in your parents living room? No problem, just spray a lil Prada and it'll smell like a runway. Just took a nasty deuce at your girl's house? One spray and the crime is erased. The applications are endless just like the memes.



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